How to Develop More Interesting Relationships

A business coach once shared with me that his #1 secret to success was to be more interested than interesting. I agree. Ironically, some of the most successful interesting people I know are also the most interested people I know. Sam Walton, founder of Walmart stores, supposedly rarely if ever forgot a name. Sam Walton also made many trusting business relationships to build a worldwide store chain. He was interested, which transcended him to become extremely interesting.

I'm not sure I'm the expert in being interested, though it's on the forefront of my mind. So here are a few strategies I'm using to manifest interest:

1. Listen--The old saying God gave us 2 ears and 1 mouth for a reason has so much truth. The more I practice yoga and meditation, the more keen my ability to pick up on the subtleties of what people are saying. For example, when you boss is asking about your work, he really may be scoping you out for a different more exciting opportunity or responsibility. I believe we pass up life changing opportunities everyday because we don't have the acuity to hear the call. Often the call is through people so listen!

2. Ask--We are all evolving people. Though we may know where one has been, and where they are now, you may find yourself full of assumptions about where they are going. The moment you feel you know someone, you are putting them on a shelf and limiting their ability to move and help you. Today is a new day, and if you ask you may find you really didn't know the person you "know" so well.

3. Real Face Time--In a world of virtual relationships, we are loosing the ability to be competent with basic social graces. I know the college freshman in my class prefer to communicate with me via email and other web based communication systems. If possible, I often wait to answer their question personally in class to have some "face time" communication. This gives me the opportunity to ask more questions and be more interested in them. Giving people our face as we speak and facing our bodies towards them are great communication strategies. I'm always amazed how many adjacent- shoulder-looking-into-the-horizon conversations I see at the gym and church and work and well everywhere. Give people real face time instead of the virtual kind.

It's intriguing to be thought of as an interesting person and being interested can certain help achieve that; though, it seems to me that if being interesting was the goal, the efforts to be interested would flop. My main motivation for becoming more interested is to develop more interesting relationships and I believe these strategies will do just that!